The Housemates are introduced and arrive at the Drawn Together House for the first time. At first it seems like they will get along well, but a string of racist comments from Clara start a major fight.
A pregnancy scare is the least of Clara's worries (and one easily settled by a talk about "the facts of life") when the rest of the household finds out about her "personal problem." It seems due to a curse cast by her wicked stepmother, her vagina has been transformed into a bizarre tentacle monster! After the initial fear, horror, and urge to form an angry mob die down, the rest of the crew bands together to help Clara break the curse by finding her "one true love."
With some not-so-gentle coaxing from his roommates, Xandir finally comes to terms with his homosexuality. But after awkwardly breaking the news to his girlfriend, and getting dumped as a result, Xandir desperately tries to find a way back in the closet. Meanwhile, after seeing Ling-Ling's incredible sewing abilities, Spanky exploits him as a source of cheap sweatshop labor, hoping to make a fortune selling knockoff sneakers to the NBA.
After she, Ling-Ling, Foxxy, and Xandir win a competition for food rights, Toot overindulges to the extreme, and desperately seeks help from Xandir in dealing with her not-so-little weight problem. Meanwhile, the starving housemates resort to drastic measures to get food, as Spanky bullies Wooldoor into helping him trap Clara's animal friends for game. And Foxxy extorts humiliating favors out of Captain Hero in exchange for food, only for their bondage to turn into bonding.
Clara's special cousin, Bleh, comes to visit the Drawn Together house, and Captain Hero bets Spanky that he'll sleep with her for 50 bucks. Meanwhile, Xandir, Toot, and Wooldoor enjoy the immense high that the fur of a depressed Ling-Ling can provide.
Clara becomes addicted to a prank made up by Spanky, crapping on pizza. This only makes things worse for Clara, due to the fact that her father refuses to let her to do the prank, or see Spanky anymore. Meanwhile, Captain Hero and Xandir try to bond, as they are roommates.
Notorious billionaire, Bucky Bucks, comes to the Drawn Together house, and hosts an Apprentice style boardroom to answer the demands of the house mates, claiming that they wanted a prize for winning something on the show. Meanwhile, Toot tries to persuade the house mates to blow up the house.
The conclusion of the cliffhanger involves the cast crash landing on a supposedly deserted island. The cast mates, with the exception of Toot, make it back to the house, where they start to interview new roommate possibilities, including Scorpion from the Mortal Kombat video games.
Spanky gets downloaded with a virus and in order to get life-saving health insurance, he must "gay marry" Xandir. Meanwhile, Foxxy is busted for not having a Mystery-Solving License and she convinces Ling-Ling to take the racially biased test for her so she can go back to college to finish up her degree.
Captain Hero suffers a bout of depression from the loss of his parents. He copes by going to therapy, but shortly thereafter, he discovers his parents are, in fact, alive. Meanwhile, the other housemates start a suicide hot-line business and learn about responsibility and working together as a team.
Captain Hero gets a visit from his ex-girlfriend, UFG (Unusually Flexible Girl), who reminds him of their marriage pact once they both hit 30. Meanwhile, Foxxy Love tries to get the Foxxy 5 band back together so they can all reclaim their fame.
Wooldoor hits puberty at long last and can't keep himself from masturbating. Thus, his Clum Babies with their healing powers are born. Clara, however, thinks this is an act against God and vows to stop him. Meanwhile, Ling-Ling's bachelor days might be numbered as his mother and father send an arranged battle mate to the Drawn Together house.
When the housemates start to notice strange Poltergeist-esque occurrences, Foxxy discovers that the house is haunted by the souls of 1,000 dead Indians. The gang decides to give a piece of their property to the Indians as a gesture of peace, and the Indians build a big Vegas-style casino.
Upon seeing the reality TV show Super Nanny, Captain Hero purposefully acts bad so he can summon Super Nanny and challenge her once and for all, because he thinks anything called super is a challenge to him. Meanwhile, Ling-Ling tries to get his driver's license. When he fails miserably, Wooldoor helps him become more "Americanized" so he can pass.
Captain Hero uses his X-ray vision to spy on the girls in the shower. As a result of doing it too much, Foxxy receives a brain tumor. Afterwards, Captain Hero feels so guilty that he decides to give up his powers, which makes him a quadriplegic in a breath-controlled wheel chair.
Captain Hero's sidekick, Captain Girl, is killed by the evil Mad-Libber and replaces her with Wooldoor. Toot learns the hardships of being a mother to a Nicaraguan baby.
Toot uses a video game cheat book to get Xandir to accompany her to her fat camp reunion. Wooldoor brings home a live-action cow from the live-action forest.
Captain Hero's alter-ego, the mild-mannered reporter Tim Tommerson, comes to visit and spends a lot of gay time with Xandir. And the housemates learn that "Drawn Together" has received an "F" from Entertainment Weekly and seek revenge.
Captain Hero is determined to win the AIDS walk, no matter how many steroids he must take to be the best walker around. Wooldoor gets in trouble at the mall for stealing some candy.
Xandir looks to his housemates for help in telling his parents he is gay. They do a little role-playing and, as usual, things get out of hand.
Clara gets an extreme make-over of her own when she gets an operation to remove her "Octopussoir" and give her a normal vagina again. The housemates, believing Toot to be old and suffering from Alzheimers, check her into an old folks home.
The best of the past two seasons in clip-show form.
Captain Hero is thrilled to discover Greeks have moved in next door, but remains oblivious to the fact that it is a family of Greek immigrants and not a Greek fraternity. When the Greeks won't let Captain Hero rush their house, he sets his sights on revenge, including fraternity-style pranks like kidnapping their daughter. Meanwhile, Ling-Ling's sickly father moves into the Drawn Together house and falls in love with Toot. Like a typical gold digger, Toot marries the rich old man for his money. But will Ling-Ling put up with losing his inheritance to a fatty?
Wooldoor's new children's show is finally hitting the air, but Clara is certain that it will turn kids gay faster than Tinky-Winky and SpongeBob combined. A Terminator from the future shows up to kill Wooldoor, but Xandir saves the little guy and explains that the show does really does turn the whole world gay. The Terminator was sent back by the remaining few straight people to ensure the straight future. In the mean time, Toot pines away for the mythical "Wiener Mobile," which is supposed to give out free hot dogs. but only to the worthy.
Foxxy refuses to participate in a house Spelling Bee to win a gift certificate to Applebee's. The truth comes out that Foxxy used to be the best speller in all the land, but had fallen far from grace after a violent racial incident at a Bee years earlier. Spanky convinces Foxxy to go for the title once again. In the meantime, Captain Hero discovers Clara has a secret sexual fetish for car crashes. Hero causes wrecks to get Clara off, but does she really love him? Or is she just using him for the car crashes?
Captain Hero discovers that the "special" Giant who's been attacking the city is actually his son! And what's worse, Hero's sister, Captain She-Ro, is the mother! Can Hero raise his inbred son to be a productive member of society? Or will the Giant destroy the world by hugging a Winnie-the-Pooh-shaped nuclear bomb? In the mean time, Clara get Munchhausen's by Proxy and earns accolades by alternately taking care of Wooldoor, and keeping him sick with drain cleaner and sledgehammers.
After the house is robbed, Captain Hero decides to get a gun for protection. But things get out of hand when Hero starts hunting with assault weapons. Adorable little Bambi convinces Hero to stop hunting deer with such violent weapons. Hero decides rids the world of all assault weapons, leaving Earth vulnerable to the attacking deer! In the mean time, Foxxy hides her thieving grandson Ray Ray in the walls of the Drawn Together house to hide him from the police. Stuck in the walls, Ray Ray spies on the housemates and ends up falling in love with the fattest woman with the biggest ass. Toot. Can her huge ass save the housemates from the attacking deer?
Captain Hero is desperate to hang out with the Cool Kids, like Spanky, Clara and Foxxy while Foxxy is desperate to save the world from a meteor. In the meantime, Ling-Ling takes up cockfighting in order to bribe the Mexican police.
Clara annoys her housemates by preaching about the upcoming rapture. When her housemates head off to the mall, Clara mistakenly thinks they've been taken off to heaven. In the mean time, the other housemates get themselves trapped in a compact parking space in the mall with little or no means of escape.
When Toot drinks salt water and goes insane while trapped in the van, she tries to convince the other roommates in the van to kill and eat Ling-Ling. Foxxy tries to escape Hot Topic's back room before the manager lets customers torture her.
A spider has a one night stand with Spanky Ham, and relationship quickly turns into a fatal attraction. Meanwhile, Captain Hero comes face to face with his arch nemesis, and forges an unlikely bond. We also learn the origin of Ling-Ling's violent tendencies - he never truly wanted to be a fighter, oh no, all he wanted to do was dance.
Wooldoor becomes the cereal mascot of Quackers cereal after the original mascot is mysteriously murdered. Wooldoor parties it up Hollywood-style with his new cereal friends, and soon finds himself addicted to Crunchberries. Toot discovers that the cereal industry is evil and tries to bring down those cereal jackasses before they lose Wooldoor forever
The eight housemates are living together as babies, and when Mommy and Daddy leave them with a babysitter they begin to plot against her. They end up killing her and have to cover up the whole thing.
Child Services puts Ling-Ling in foster care, where he ends up in the house of Uncle Ben. Foxxy decides to save Ling-Ling from foster care and ends up discovering who her father is. Hero is jealous of Xandir's nipple ring and decides to get one himself. After he gets hit by lighting, Hero realizes he can use his nipple ring to communicate with himself from the past.
An Indian family mistakes Toot for a cow. Foxxy recovers a suppressed memory about being sexually abused.
The housemates look back at the season and compete to stay in the house in an American Idol type competition, while they are forced to sing some show favorites with some new twists.
Spanky Ham minisode
When the mystery-solving musician Foxxy Love notices she and her fellow housemates can curse without being bleeped—something they’ve never been able to do before—she realizes their show has been canceled. Determined to get back on the air, the gang travels to Make-A-Point-Land in order to get a point (and get back on the air).
