After years as a journalist and filmmaker covering topics like crypto, holocaust and showbiz, everything changed for me 3 years ago after the birth of my daughter. While I haven't planned to be a mother, I decided to keep this pregnancy at 41, however this grass turn out to be too high for lawn mower – I was ready to go for a rave, not to be locked in a baby dark room for 3 years. I felt like my brain had been reprogrammed overnight. The analytical mindset I once relied on—quick to analyse, explore, and understand complex topics—seemed to vanish, replaced by a simpler, instinct-driven state that prioritized pure survival and nurturing yet mixed with unhinged chaos, aux naturelle psychedelic downloads plus no sense of inhibition or fear of being seen.