Graham notices that Morgan is cooking bacon at an odd time; Morgan reveals that James is a hampire and must consume pork products or die. His condition was triggered by eating cursed meat, leading to a host of unusual attributes and weaknesses. Morgan recounts the failed attempts at curing James. Paul makes a jam sandwich, but he uses similarly-cursed jelly and becomes a jampire. Graham wonders what could possibly be next; Bill then enters, singing "Wake Me Up" by the band Wham and complaining about the absence of bacon and jam in the fridge.